because i opened my heart to you...

yup. it was a classic one. an over-the-phone breakup. just like that. in the 6ish minutes that we talked, our 4 and a half months that we spent together was over--and felt wasted, and all those times we had--over, just like that. you think im being dramatic? whatever, if you think that, you obviously have no idea what it's like to be the dumpee--not the dumper (and im nawt toilet talkin' here!)

so i got dumped. sigh, i'll finish this later. too sad right now.

because nobody uses damn labels...

"I push people" -Ms. Norbury, Mean Girls

Possibly the greatest movie to be produced in 2007...well tis true people, I do push people...lately, I've been pushing myself. Pushing myself to be the best that I can. School-wise, family-wise, religion-wise, and social-wise. That's a lot of wisdom for one person. Well, my social life feels like it's going to crumble right in front of me, soon. The two guys I've been "seeing" are both going..well, good I guess. Smooth sailing. Except...I'm with both of them--err "with" both of them? So because nobody uses damn labels anymore, it's technically okay that I'm seeing both of them. So am I a two-timer? I guess, technically I'm not...but to any reasonable person (thank you, T.L. business 101) I'm being a bad person, or a cheater.

The sad thing is...my heart definitely knows which guy I really want to be with. But time, location and probably God are all telling me differently. I now feel, or have been feeling, pushed to go towards the other option, which is also a great great option, he's just not the one I want to be with right now. And the sadder (it's a word to me, alright) thing is that no matter how badly two people want to be with each other, sometimes they're just not meant to be. :( We can try all we want, pretend all we want, but it just won't work. Guess that's just how things go. Blows.

Only me. All my life I go through life boyfriend-less, guys not having any interest in me (I can't blame them, I was a pretty unfortunate looking kid) and now God has blessed me with two great guys..at the same time..oy..

--010

because i'm trying so damn hard...

TO WORK OUT AND BE FIT. Being health-conscientious is a hard task to do, lemme tell you. It's especially hard to break free from binge eating habits, but I'm trying. Today, my sister, mom and I went to a fun Zumba class. I was running on three--yes three, hours of good ol sleep. And this Zumba teacher was INTENSE. My body really suprised me. I somehow made it through the whole one hour class without collapsing of exhaust (or heat, Zumba-ers get suh-weeaatty.) All in all it was fun and it woke me up and now I'm pumped and running on high energy. I ate a small breakfast before Zumba class (whole grain cheerios w fat free milk and a few pieces of watah-melon.) and drank two freaking bottles of water during Zumba. Then Zumba, I did some crunches, leg lifties, and the holy grail of ab workouts--planks! Then I had lunch, (oh yeah after Zumba, I jumped into a cold shower, I felt so gross and sweaty.) which was a tuna sandwich (yum) I think I got a little snappy with my parents about my sandwich because it was so much bread (CARBS=bad) then I was like meh! I think I just get snappier when I am running on less sleep. Sorry renties :(

I WANT MY SICK ABS back, who the hell cares if summer's ending soon. Oh. A boy might be coming over to my house for a weekend. Hehe. I'm excited. Oh, and really really nervous. Wish me luck!

--010 (oddest 1 out)

because they're all on my case...

I was woken up rudely this morning. Of course I wasn't expecting to be waken up by a couple of humming birds outside my window, a rooster crowing atop my roof, or a maid with a cup of steaming hot tea for me...but nevertheless, I would've chosen any of those choices above the way I was woken up. "GEEZ. Wake up!" My older sister's grumpy voice was what chimed through my room this morning. "NOW!" It was 12:30 in the afternoon. Can't a college kid catch a break? Sheesh, I'm just at that age where my body craves to stay up till the sun rises and snoozes till it's dark outside. Call me a midnight owl. So outta place, my older sister wakes up at around 8 or 9 just because she does. My parents? 5 or 6 am to go to work. Me? Um, like mid-afternoon.

Oh, another delightful thing that I had to deal with today: rejection. No, no I was actually the one doing the rejecting this time. I basically had to set this nice (but creepily obsessive) guy straight. I met him over the weekend and he kind of fell in love with me? I don't really know how that worked because we only talked for about 10 minutes. Well, all in all, I hate rejecting people; especially people who adore me! Just to go off about why this kid was creepily obsessive: he said he'd like to see me again, but I was leaving the town we met in the very next morning. He said he would travel to the bus stop in the morning just to say goodbye to me (yes, cute, an aw moment.) The next morning, when I was more mindful of thing (finally sober) I decided to be realistic and "get rid of the guy" (yikes, d-bag terms, I know) so a couple things went "wrong" to interfere with his plans of meeting me the next morning. I "forgot" the address of my bus station, "had an earlier bus than I expected", and "phew! had just made my bus" (that one actually did end up happening.) So we just texted my whole ride home, but then I fell asleep and he texted me FIVE times after I didn't respond to the first text I ignored when I was sleeping. I decided not to write back to him, simply because I didn't feel like making the effort. Then he called me at midnight, THAT SAME DAY, which I didn't answer (d-bag alert, stop I know!) the next day, he texted me twice, still no answer from me. And today, he texted me once again, then called me twice (both of which I didn't answer) and I finally set him straight in the nicest way that I could. Boy did I feel mean :( I just really didn't see the point of talking to him, it's not like things would go anywhere. Yup, attracting weird, obsessive guys would be a trait of mine that I got to inherit. Ughhh alright, well I'm gonna shower, try to wash this dirty mean d-bag stuff off myself.

Till next time folks,
--010 (oddest 1 out)

because that's just how it happened...

It’s always awkward to start a new blog. This happens to be my first real one, so please, go easy on me. Well, introductions to anything usually start with some names. My name--is irrelevant in this case, but I’m sure someone’s bound to figure out what it is. What I do want to tell you is that I’m the odd one out in my family. Typical? Maybe. But I find my story to be a pretty interesting one.

Let’s see, I’d say it all started the day I was born--no exaggeration here people, I was the baby that had to be C-sectioned out of my mother. I came along after my older sister of three years who gave my mom an easy pain-less (more like knife-less) vaginal delivery. Sorry mom. My sister and I grew up as two skinny-minis. Some family friends would gravely ask our parents if we were malnourished. Some crazies went as far as using the word “anorexic” around us. We were neither, we both just happened to be invested in all types of sports and were born with high metabolism but we were perfectly healthy.

Skipping a decade or so in life, my older sister stayed skinny, petite, small-boned, 5’0” and about 91 pounds. My body, on the other hand, had different plans in store. The one thing that kept my sister and me from being the same was our chest sizes. Mine kept growing along with my height while hers stopped at a 32A cup. At age 16, I was 5’3”, 94 pounds and carrying around 32B sized boobs. My sister and I would always get mixed up for who was the older sibling. That frustrated her, and still does.

So, I know I only covered part of the reasons why I'm the oddest 1 out of my family. There's lots more to come. So for now,
--010 (oddest 1 out)